You Went Alone?! Why?

I just got back from a four night vacation (!!!!, it actually felt like a vacation), at a gorgeous wellness resort in Arizona - I loved it so much I made up a silly ditty and wish I could sing it for ya 😆. 

But... in planning this time away, I didn't realize how many people would be so surprised I was going alone.

I love traveling with my hubby, my kids, my mom and sister, my friends and extended fam… and I also crave being alone.  Admittedly, it has been years since I've carved out a solid amount of time alone outside of work travel but hot damn, this time away was really spacious and yummy. 

If you haven’t taken a solo trip before, or it has been awhile, I want to share four reasons why I loved it...

  1. FREEDOM. A lot of my life moves hour by hour around my full schedule, and other people’s schedules (mainly two active 6 and 10 year olds). I went from checking my phone constantly to figure out where I was supposed to be, or who I was meant to be connecting with, to feeling completely free to do What I wanted, When I wanted, and not needing to check or coordinate or converse with anyone about it.  At sunrise... do I want to Stay in Bed?  Sure.  Make a yummy pour-over coffee?  Yea.  Go to the gym?  Why not?  Walk the labyrinth?  Grab a coat.  With that expansive freedom everyday to do whatever I wanted, I could feel my heart open wide. 

  2. THE QUIET + STILLNESS.  Without a companion, I had scrumptious and spacious time to journal, read (I may have been slightly over-zealous with the number of books I brought 😆), rest, listen to the birds, feel the sun, slowly taste my food, watch the changing sky, smell the desert cacti… the quiet was intoxicating.  I didn't have to DO anything... I could instead just turn on my senses and be in the moment.  And again, not needing to coordinate with anyone meant that there were less group decisions and discussions... just me, myself, and I choosing where to direct my body and place my attention.  Ahhhhmazing.

  3. RE-IDENTIFY AS ME.  Not me as a wife, or mom, or coach, or guide, or entrepreneur… me… simply me.  It was like having a first date with myself and learning all about me again - what do I like?  what do I want to do? what do I want to eat?  where do I want to go?  what are my dreams and intentions?  what am I ready to let go of?  It was slightly disorienting at first and made me realize how often I go with the flow or wait for others to suggest an idea -- but I got the hang of it and on my last day, felt so full of me I was ready to head back to Santa Barbara and re-anchor into home and family.  I felt like an overflowing fountain ready to pour all that love and gratitude to those around me.

  4. NEW CONNECTIONS.  Because I was alone, I was able to meet wonderful people of different ages, stages, backgrounds, professions… people outside of my normal circle going through l-i-f-e.  Hardships, happy-ships, all of it…  And while you can of course meet other people traveling with others, it isn’t quite as easy as when you’re alone.  Being with others outside of my normal routine allowed me to remember parts of myself I hadn’t accessed for a while: the version of me who loves to sing and teach, the version of me who felt so bubbly when I got engaged, the me who was nervous, scared, and curious about meeting the baby in my belly and who I would be as a mom.  And meeting those ahead of me inspired appreciation for life, excellent health, deep friendships, and intimate partnership.  It was beautiful to connect amongst strangers for moments of reflection as well as deep and meaningful conversation.  It reminded me of the oneness of humanity and the beauty of vulnerability, connection, and intentional living. 

While I don't always have 5 days to step away and connect to the stillness, freedom, and me… I do always have 5 minutes. 

Life is incredibly full and can feel chaotic but I can find that 5 minute oasis on a daily basis.  

Those intentional 5 minutes can be the difference between being swept up in the chaos and feeling out of control, or feeling strongly grounded and capable of adjusting and moving with what's present.

I’m curious, when you find 5 minutes to yourself, what activity do you find most nourishing and energizing?  And if that feels far away from your awareness right now, let me know and I can put some ideas up on IG in the coming days.

And also, if you have traveled alone, what do you love about it?  And if you haven't yet, how come?  

Love to you all,

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